Eat This Not That: Fast Food Restaurants

Okay, I was bored and I started looking at these food choice things. There's a whole site dedicated to them, advising you what to order at restaurants, what kind of foods to eat, etc. Basically a weight loss program where you don't have to do jumping jacks for an hour everyday or indulge in tasteless 100 calorie versions of every food that you eat.

I came across an interesting article about fast food restaurants. Unlike most everything else on this site, I was rather surprised by some of the things listed.

First up was Domino's.

Domino's Chicken Carbonara Breadbowl Pasta

1480 calories

56 g fat (24 g saturated)
2220 mg sodium Basically, what we have here is a big wad of pizza dough hollowed out and stuffed with noodles, cream, and cheese. That’s why half of these calories come from refined carbohydrates and another third come from fat. This leaves little room for healthy nutrients such as protein and fiber. Three slices of pizza with chicken, peppers, and parmesan cheese will give you the same basic flavor profile while saving you more than 900 calories.
...Okay. First of all - who would want to eat this?

It looks like someone threw up in a bowl and tried to decorate it.

Do we seriously need an article to tell us that's not healthy?!

If you walk up to a bomb, and there's five seconds left before it blows up in your face, are you just gonna stand there like a dummy?

"...OOOOHHH I WONDER IF THIS THING IS GONNA BLOW UP!"

No! Because when you look at it you can tell it wouldn't be a good scenario.

LESSON OF THE DAY: DON'T INGEST ANYTHING THAT RESEMBLES, FEELS LIKE OR REMINDS YOU AT ALL OF A BODILY FUNCTION.

I went to a Mexican restaurant and when we sat down at the table the waitress handed us a basket of chips and cheese dip. (Well, I'm still not positive it was cheese, but) I knew I wouldn't like it. But of course, here goes everybody sitting the table with there words of wisdom - "YOU DON'T KNOW IF FOOD IS GOOD UNTIL YOU TRY IT!"

That is bullcrap.

You can easily tell if you are going to like a good by the texture of it, and by the way it looks and smells. Guarantee. When I put that cheese dip in my mouth, it was about as big of a shock as Ricky Martin being gay. I spit that crap right out washed the taste out with some Dr. Pepper.

And you know how I could tell I wasn't going to like it?

...BECAUSE I KNEW I WASN'T GOING TO LIKE SOMETHING THAT LOOK AND FELT LIKE CUM!!!

It was thick and sticky and it had a weird crusty surface and it was shiny.

WHAT KIND OF CHEESE IS SHINY AND STICKY?!

Like, who looks at a food and goes -

"Hmm... this looks like a bowl of cum! ...I guess I'll try it anyway."

Why even put yourself through that torture?

Out of time to write. Part 2 coming later. :)